How do you like me now?

Dear Readers:

WARNING! I’m about to take a leap off the “Politically Correct” high dive, so hold on to your tiny tummies and watch for the splash!

I know the story we all tell: that we had gastric bypass surgery for our health, to prolong our lives, cure co-morbidities and to live better. It wasn’t about appearance; it was all about our health and wellness. I could talk about the health and wellness benefits of weight loss surgery for seven days and seven nights: “Blah, blah, blah – YAWN!”

Sure health, wellness, fitness are all well and good (thank you Dr. Wittgrove). But the things I honestly thrill and chill about, the things I leap for joy over – the cherry on the bariatric sundae – are those “How do you like me now?” moments! Toby Keith sings the song:

How do you like me now?
How do you like me now,
Now that I'm on my way?
Do you still think I'm crazy
Standin’ here today?
I couldn’t make you love me
But I always dreamed about living in your radio
How do you like me now?

This is my bariatric anthem because for too long, for too many years I felt belittled and demeaned because I was – horror of horror’s – fat! But then I made the ULTIMATE sacrifice – I gave up every comfort I’d ever known and had the good doctor whack my stomach down to the size of an egg. And I shrunk and was fat no more. And I avenged myself. These are a few of my “How do you like me now?” moments:

The chance meeting with a former “love interest” from college who broke my heart and spirit when he said to me, “Sorry, I don’t date fat chicks.” Years later when our paths crossed again I was thin and he was fat. How do you like me now?

The day the coffee shop manager handed me my coffee and said, “There’s no charge for a pretty lady.” How do you like me now?

The day I went to Sears to purchase my second treadmill because I’d worn out the first one. The clerk looked me up and down, not with disgust implying it was about time I do something about my fat, but instead, he looked with appreciation and said, “I can tell you are serious about exercise.” How do you like me now?

The day I saw another man shake my husband’s hand and say, “You have yourself a FINE woman there,” appreciating me for my outward appearance. How do you like me now?

The day I had sex with my husband in broad daylight, naked! How do you like me now?

The year we attended my family reunion and my cousin who excluded me from childhood games because I was a “fatty-fatty-two-by-four” noticed how thin I was and didn’t comment. She didn’t comment because it was her who now “couldn’t get through the kitchen door.” How do you like me now?

The day I didn’t get fair raise for my job performance and I had the courage to speak up and say this won’t do. When I was fat I would have sulked silently, but now I stood up for myself and I was awarded a fair raise. How do you like me now?

The day I went to the hotel pool in a two-piece swimsuit and didn’t feel like a beached whale and nobody stared or whispered behind there hands “look at the fat lady.” How do you like me now?

The day I was stopped for speeding and the officer said, “No ticket for you, today. Just a friendly warning,” and he winked. How do you like me now?

The day I boarded an amusement parks roller coaster and fit quite comfortably in the seat. How do you like me now?

The day I ran into my former sisters-in-law, AKA, the “glamour girls” and they didn’t recognize me. Their brother divorced me because I was fat. I am fat no more. How do you like me now?

The day I stopped on the sidewalk, bent at the waist to tie my shoelace and a guy whistled at me. How do you like me now?

The day I walked into the “normal” sized clothing store at the mall, and nobody turned to stare and wonder what the hell the fat lady was doing in there. How do you like me now?

And the list goes on . . . How do you like me now?


So, tell me, What are your “How do you like me now?” moments?